Breathe in the world, breathe out yourself

I went for a run while repeating this pointer.

I could soon feel myself brushing the world in the wondrous hues of spring. Colours point out how the world we see is not simply perceived as it is, but being modelled by our minds. And this can be felt rather than just understood.

Trees, birds and flowers. When I named something "out there", I felt these labels existed in the world rather than in my head. And so naming became more intimate; connecting to these entities, rather than simply observing from a distance.

As I came upon a person from behind, I recognised my expectations influencing perception. It was as if I imagined eyes in the back of their head, pointed at me and converging at some focal point behind my face. A while later, I heard a cyclist coming up from behind me, and this time the sensation was of their eyes boring into the back of my head. Is the felt location of the self simply a mental algorithm? Isn’t my heart as much a part of me as my brain?

Pondering this, I came upon an old lady who greeted me as I ran past. Her gaze seemed to fall past my eyes, towards my ears, and this brought a sense of amusement. The focal point didn’t fully resolve and I felt less self-conscious.

“Breathe in the world, breathe out yourself.”

I looked at the overcast sky. How does one breathe in all of that? And isn’t it already painted with the hues and textures of the mind? The “me” is too small to contain it, and the “I” is already closer to it than we think.

I disturbed some birds along the path and one of them took flight with a bundle of twigs in its beak. It was flying off to build its nest. There was happiness in this simple understanding; intimacy in an occurrence that would usually feel separate to my life.

Our awareness of experience can’t be reduced to a single location, shape or size. Later in the day, as I sat beside my partner, I felt my mind was bottling up her unquantifiable sentience into the external appearance of a human being. If we all saw each other for real, there would be no strife in the world.

 

_{Photo from www.freepik.com}