Thoughts Arise

I am in the warmth of the kettle. In the sound of water pouring into the cup. Yet also in the rhythm of water sloshing in the dishwasher. Now in the feeling of the cold floor under my bare feet. I am the thought of my future self writing this down. I am the actor forgetting the script, hesitating in the action started a moment ago. I am in a memory brought forth by an image; standing under gum trees embracing my daughter. I am back in the present, and yet earlier in the day. In the remembered sound of her tiny voice forming an unlikely word. I am in the laugh as it forms in my chest and escapes my lips.   Photo from www.freepik.com  

Imagine empty space. This emptiness is not static; there is an energy intrinsic to space itself. An energy that is causing our universe to expand over time. So imagine space expanding over eons. It doubles in size and then doubles again and again. Exponential growth driven by a constant energy density; new space emerging and expanding at the same rate. Time passes. All stars have died, their dust dissipated, black holes have evaporated. All that remains is an ever growing emptiness filled with a dark energy. Imagine a fluctuation in this field of energy. An infinitesimal part of space begins to expand faster. But this higher energy is unstable and the field decays. A tremendous pressure is released. Energy, matter, the start of a new universe. Or the birth of ours. Fundamental particles form, then atoms and the first elements. The expansion of space is now tamed by the matter that curves its shape. Clusters of matter emerge, and from them galaxies, stars and planets. Space continues to

I see my reflection in the mirror. The koan from last night’s meditation comes to mind. “Who am I?” “That’s me in the mirror,” comes the immediate response. But this answer seems hilariously insufficient. Does this face that I identify with so deeply, capture an iota of who I am? I have an internal world that is irreducible from me. The koan isn’t expected to invoke a rational response. But for an instant it shifts my perception. The sense of having a face and a body implies an external world. Yet this external world too must be experienced within consciousness. So where does the inner world end and the outer one begin? For a brief moment, the boundary between the two becomes permeable. It seems to be composed entirely of ephemeral sensations.   Photo from www.freepik.com